A Warm Mother In the Cold

It’s been more than a year since she departed. But this Monday I took the courage to drive 200km to celebrate what could have been her 86th bday. The weather is rainy and cold and yet all that I felt and remembered was the warmth, love, and sunshine she brought to our lives.

I fondly remember her adept ability to juggle her time and finances. She never lived an extravagant or pompous life – she saved and kept her attention and purse ready for any of her nine children when they needed loving support. Happy birthday, Mommy. You will always be missed and loved.

A Warm Mother in the Crucible

My mother had a co-public school teacher colleague, Tita Julie. And they had a commonality that was not easily seen. They had their sons study in the same high school — my Mom’s youngest (me), and Tita Julie’s eldest and my friend, Renato Fernandez.

Nato (as we fondly called him) and I shared a common mother’s warmth “trivia” – our “baunan” — that symbolized the priceless roles our mothers played in our lives.

For whatever reason I vividly remember Nato’s yellow and rounded tupperware lunch box and I could not even remember how mine looked. All that I knew was that our baons were diligently prepared by our mothers, day-in and day-out.

Reunions and Regrets

I was advised that Nato came back from the US the other week and I am sure that his presence brought so much joy to their clan especially his mother who is fortunately still alive.

We regularly meet as a batch and tried to meet him in Dagupan City. But it was not meant to be and he finally went back to the States last Wednesday. I remembered that Thursday wishing to have at least coffee at the airport before his flight back to the US given the cancellation of the earlier Sunday meet up. I was soundly “reminded” that his trip was the other day. Sniff… 🙁

The next day was the grim news that could break any mother’s heart  – Nato passed away 3 hours before his plane touched down. A batch mate who is also residing in the US delivered the news that sent a chill down our spines. He was too young to depart.

I read of John McCain’s 106 y.o. mother having the unbearable role to bring her 83 y.o. son to his grave instead of the other way around. But a younger mother bringing her not even 50 y.o. son to his resting place? I can only pray for Tita Julie’s strength and grace in this most trying and heart-wrenching time.

A Warm “Mother School” in the Background

After visiting my Mom at the cemetery I went straight to another familiar person – someone that bore the same last name — Bobby De Vera. We were distantly related and he lived in our neighboring barangay Calmay.

When Mother Goose Special Science High School (MGSSHS) opened its scholarship to the young, talented, and economically challenged people like me, he got in first and I also did the year after. We were indigent scholars, an affinity I will always wear as a badge.

Pioneering Goosians

We became part of the pioneering students of that school. We were I think less than a 100 when the full 1st to 4th year classes were finally lodged in the 3-storey block building. The classrooms were even named, if I remember correctly, Galileo, Darwin, Curie, and Newton — a rather ingenious way to encourage us impressionable students to shoot for the stars!

The last time I saw Bobby was during their high school graduation. This time he was graduating again, eerily quiet at that, and more filled with white “robes” and curtains.

When I entered their house, I was astounded by both his picture on his coffin glass as well as the wreath right beside. The picture is Bobby all right – the same kind and sheepishly looking gentleman he had always been known amongst the Goosians of our time. He had this quiet forbearance that was not taught in schools and yet innately made his imprint to anyone observant.

Twin Loss

He died the day after Nato did and the Goosians of the 80’s lost two gentle souls in a couple of days. It is a reminder to us that kind spirits are always precious to God given the griefs that we have to bear for losing such “stars” in their own right.

Ironically, while the world continues to celebrate worldly accomplishments, we have always wished that we possess that same gentleness and humility in life. The Creator himself seems to prefer it, His stark reminder that whatever we become is not a product of our brilliance but His loving and powerful orchestration that hopefully we learn to recognize.

The wreath wrote “Condolences from Mother Goose Special Science High School.” It broke my heart and made it leap at the same time. How I wish a Goosian never have to see a message like that. And yet I have never felt the message of my alma mater as resolute as such.

Goosian Ways and Warmth

Oh the nurturing memories of that school for rambunctious lads and lasses like us! We certainly tried the patience of our teachers but we will cherish their familiar voices and parental looking faces. And yes, some of them had “bohemian” tendencies so avoid thinking that we were raised with a boring wand! in the end, they all professionally tried to keep us within a special science school’s path.

But it was not the intellectualism that I deeply appreciated during Bobby’s wake. I felt proud of Bobby’s class – the upper Batch ’85. I have never truly acknowledged the seniority of this group. I guess I never had the chance. But now, I feel appreciative on how his mates extended the assistance and warmth.

So this is a tribute to the school that formed the pioneering batches. There will always be a feather bond amongst us. Bobby left a 5 year old named Angela. And I know when the time comes to reminisce her dad, she would have known what it meant to be under the wings of a fairy tale’ish Mother Goose that her Dad was once at.

Farewell, Nato and Bobby. Your spirits will always be feather gentle in our hearts.